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confused mind but w a slight sense of direction now

choosing mods for the final time (starting year 4 sem 2 alrdy yikes) make me feel the need to decide the mods that i plan to take very very wisely. idk why. maybe its bcos its the last time im ever gna be studying again or maybe just bcos i feel a bit more mature in choosing things and want to be more responsible for the choices i make. and in life. in general. anw so i am still contemplating btw 3 core mods.

  1. adv geomorpholgy
  2. dvpt in SEA
  3. climate change-process, impact and responses

it will be interesting to read this blog post again aft ive completed my sem and studies (once and for all GULPS) and see how lame i am for contemplating over such minute (or maybe not so minute cause they’ll def bring to the place i will be at in the future or maybe not urgh) stuff.

so yeah idk which to pick cause all 3 of them have got really stark pros and cons like for eg. adv geomor – the lecturer is lu xixi and hes chinese accent is so thick i cant take it esp when i took his water and the envt mod. ohmy. dont wna repeat that again and him being monotonous prolly ‘drained away’ my passion and interest to study physical geog. ohwell. but yeah i thought i should take it just cause its what i like – plate tectonics etc (end my sem with sth i started with? love them volcanoes and water) plus it gives me quite a nice timetable and quite okay workload??

dvpt in SEA – the content sounded very interesting like its abt envt protection at the expense of dvpt and vice versa. its like the so in thing to learn abt now esp if i wna do some urban planning or just some envt/preservation/dvpt work in future. whats keeping me from doing it is the workload like 25% indiv essay (not to bad 1.5k words), 25% grp video proj (what if my grp aint that good D:) and 50% finals (hate finals cant seem to do well in them but last sem’s result made me think that i give some more time and rly study i can ace it) soooo dilemma. kinda inclined to this one.

lastly, climate change. i dont think i will even consider this if not for my grp mate who suggested tkg this cause workload is light. buttt okay i dont just go for the light workload. esp with the trumpocene, i thought it would be good to know abt the skeptism surrounding climate change etc. but idk how it will rly benefit me in future . also deterred from tkg this cause of the modelling parts etc (tho i dont need to memorise them etc in essays or finals cause no finals).

SO HOWWW…. i rly cant decide.

interest? nice timetable? workload? for the future?

Allah please guide me as to what I will be in the future so that i can choose mods and stuff to prep me adequately for my future career….aminnnn ya Allah.


also cause i cant decide which mods to take, told mama and actly ayah, nad and kiki abt it. and mama said to do sth of my interest like as in dont just think abt workload or sth u like to do but cant apply in the future.

so i guess dvpt in sea is a yes. now for the other two…

oh also im tkg spanish 1 insya Allah thats why ive been thinking of wating a lighter workload this sem so that i can focus all my mods sufficiently… sigh.

also, aft solat isyak just now (kinda prayed quite late just now sigh MUST IMPROVE NEW YEAR LEH), was thinking abt so many things. like im gna start working soon?! like aft this sem???? omg. insya Allah, Allah will lead me to a career that i will enjoy and is fulfilling and beneficial to myself, my family and my religion AMIN. please open yr doors of bounty ya Allah.


also, having travelled to turkey – cappadocia then london and paris with the fam was THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED IN 2016!!!! Alhamdullilah for the opportunity to travel tgt with the family and that everything went on smoothly and we came bacek safely ALHAMDULILLAH.

and yes travelling to these places and observing how muslims in this countries practice islam is both heartwarming and made me realise how little my deeds are thus far. or rather how very lax i am as a muslim like forgetting to say insya Allah, alhamdulillah and astaghfirullah and praying on time. and even reading the quran. the ppl there esp in london and some turkey places (esp muslims in the mesjit) and idris (the paris tour guide) hold on to their faith more strongly than i am (and he q recently just converted like idk 5 yrs ago??) plus they know so much of islamic history which i am ashamed that i dont know so many of these stuff and im alrdy 22 :O

1:21am Sat 7 Jan 2017 now oh perfect date!


kinda sleepy now. sch starts next wk and im stil deciding which mods to take. Allah please help me and ease my affairs amin!


i need to…

  1. learn how to use photoshop
  2. cook more often and exciting dishes
  3. cook naan and butter chicken yumz
  4. read quran 2 pages each day
  5. qadak my puasa ramadhan (who ask me not to write down how many ive repaid??? now i cant rmb and hv to start all over again -.- lesson learnt)
  6. find out what kind of jobs i wna do
  7. lower my expectations and be happy and grateful if what i have
  8.  and most importantly, dont keep on regretting on sth thats ALRDY OVER and blame stuff but be contented it happen as it is
  9. go on search of finding abt myself – what my goals are, milestones in life, what i wna do for a living, learn to embrace what Allah has given to me
  10. find peace in nature – go on solo walks and reflect and think abt life – how blessed i am and what i can do to contribute to society as a career

sleeeepy now. gdnight.


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